Parent's Corner

Train up a child in the way the he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. - Proverbs 22:6

Resources for Parent's of Teens
Trinity Christian Counseling seeks to help parents ignite a healthy relationship and maintain a lasting connection with their teens. Please check out the below list of resources, which we hand-picked just for YOU!

Focus on the Family Website   A great resource that helps families thrive!
How to Stay Christian in College   Author: J. Budziszewski
The Love Dare for Parents   Author: Stephen Kendrick
Kingdom Parenting   Author: Miles Monroe
Boundaries with Teens   Author: John Townsend
Parenting Teens with Love and Logic   Author: Cline and Fay
Five Love Languages of Teenagers   Author: Gary Chapman

Tips for Parents:
  1. If your teenager wants to come in your room and relax on your bed, let them! They are looking for some bonding time. They might not tell you, but you are their SAFE SPACE. They may want to talk about their day, need help with a problem, or just need the comfort of your presence.
  2. You are not supposed to be afraid of your children. Your children should fear you and God, meaning they respect you and God as the authority in their lives. God entrusts your children to you to LOVE, TEACH, and GUIDE, so they can grow up to be productive citizens of society. When you let your children rule over you, they will not learn to listen to and respect any other adult either.
  3. Open up your home to your child's friends. Be the place they want to come and hang out. This gives you an opportunity to know your own child better, to get to know your child's friends and gives you security in knowing where they are and the kind of company they are keeping. Be a fun, inviting, safe space for your child and his or her friends.
  4. Listen and be attentive to your child. They are seeking your undivided attention when they come to you. Listen with understanding, and don't rush to "fix" the problem. Do more than hear and offer advice. Listen with empathy.
  5. Instead of focusing on negative behaviors, catch your child doing something right. Whenever your child does something good, acknowledge them and tell them how much you appreciate what they have done. In Proverbs 3:27 God says "Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it."
  6. Make a concerted effort to show interest in the things your child is interested in. Support him or her in their passion. This teaches your child that you are always there to support and back him up. Criticizing your child by saying things like, "Aren't you too old for that?" or "I don't know why you like this so much" communicates the complete opposite.
  7. One particular area of which every parent should be aware is how to address negative behaviors. Do not focus too much on the behavior itself. The focus is on the motivation behind the negative behavior. A good question to ask is, "Why would you behave that way?" Never equate the behavior with the child. If you want to get to the heart of the behavior, seek the heart of the child.
  8. As parents, it is our job to help shape our children's value structure. This can only be done by having conversations with our children about our values and how we use them to make decisions, as well as modeling the family's value structure in our everyday lives. As a parent, have you thought about what values you want to pass on to your kids, and do your actions support those values?
  9. Rules without relationship lead to rebellion. Be just as dedicated to investing in your relationship with your kids as you are in enforcing the rules of the house.
  10. Want better communication in your family? Try Family Meetings. This time can be used to find out what's going on in your children's physical, emotional and spiritual lives, or just to spend time together or plan a family vacation. Let them know that Family Meetings are a safe and fun way to express themselves.

Trinity Christian Counseling is here to meet all your child and teen counseling needs, and we help families too! Click the 'Get Started' or 'Contact Us' links at the top of the page to get started.